To the same Friend, a year later

My friend, you are so
much like Rogue. You take other
people’s fantasies
Their works are your world
You live in them, an escape
from your daily life.
What is driving you?
what all are you running from,
that does this to you?
You are escaping
from this world, hurting me.
Do you see anything?
Do you see this heart?
Do you see my tears for you?
Do you see my love?
You probably don’t.
You are like an animal,
both caged and wounded.
Looking for escape;
an exit; sweet, beautiful
freedom from this life.
You may never know this;
my heart is breaking for you,
I’m praying for you.
Loving you through this.
Friend, you have hurt me deeply,
but I can’t leave you.
Will you ever wake?
Day always comes after night,
and peace after war.
This nightmare won’t last;
they never do, you know-
know that God is there.
God is that for you.
He will bring you through this place.
He will free you soon.
Freedom in bondage;
courage in this night; for you.
This is why He died.
I know you know this,
in your head, at least. But do
you believe this truth?
Believe in your heart?
or is it just head faith?
I pray it’s heart faith.
It seems so common,
I know. I was there, too, in
that world where God is
so close, and yet so far,
so normal that you don’t see.
It’s almost all lies.
It’s true that God’s here,
but are you listening to
His very still voice?
Are you seeking Him?
Are you watching for your love?
Or is it habit?
I feel like I don’t
know who you are anymore,
but I still love you.
I know this love is
not mine, ‘cus I’m just a mess,
but it’s a small bit
of God’s love for you.
If this is how I can love,
ho much more awesome
is the entirity
of His love for you, my friend?
My hurt and hate are
gone, drowned by His love
and forgiveness. He has made
it real to me, friend.
And I can’t say it enough,
I LOVE YOU, through my hurting,
the wounds you gave me.
I forgive you, though.
Yes, I hurt, but so do you.
I want to help you.
Please let me be here
for you, like you weren’t for me
without knowing it.
God made humans for
each other, and I intend
to fill my purpose.
I don’t and won’t fit
in a mould, ‘cus blending in
is not who I am.
But I will be here
for you, my friend, in your hurt.
Please know this fact, friend.
 
~2-15-2010~
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